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January 31, 2007 / missknowitall

12 Year Old Baby

NOTE:  While this is a question and answer dealing with temper tantrums there folows a stream of conversation about teens who want to wear diapers that may interest, and hopefully inform, you. 

Dear Little Miss,

I have a 12-yr-old daughter who yells at me every single day about one thing or another and still has some pretty big tantrums.  It’s usually over things like being asked to clean her room or do her chores, which are definitely appropriate for her age in terms of both difficulty and scope.  Her idea of “fair” is getting what she wants.  She cries unbelievably loudly when she’s really bent out of shape and if I want to be heard over her bellowing I have to raise my voice.  She wants us to have a close relationship but she’s driving me not only insane but further and further away with each of her episodes. Please help!

Dear Tantrum Tamer,

It sounds to me like your daughter forgot to leave the temper tantrums back with her diapers and old baby toys.  If she isn’t willing to give up the baby manners then I see no reason why she should have given up everything else from that stage in her life too.  I suggest that, the next time she is away from the house, you should restore things to their proper order.  Remove all of her big girl toys (hide them where she won’t be able to get them) and leave in her a room a basket of diapers, binkies, and rattles.  I’m sure she will throw one doozie of a tantrum for you after seeing what you’ve done, but at least her room will fit her actions.  Once the screaming stops just firmly state that when she can prove that she has given up acting like a baby, you will stop treating her like one.  Make sure she proves herself by behaving like a big kid for 2 weeks straight, which includes doing her big girl chores, before you give her toys back.  If she acts up again then start the count all over again.  She will be bored out of her mind so make sure you have some grown up things for her to do such as her chores, good books to read, letters to write to family, or maybe you two could start spending some grown up time together.  Let the room do the punishing, just ignore any tantrums and love your daughter whenever she is acting in a mature manner.  If you start to do something fun together and she decides to throw a tantrum, just calmly stop what you are doing, turn around and go home or put the game away, and let her know that she must be tired and needs a rest (you would do the same for any little baby).  I think a desire to enjoy big girl life again will help her to change the way she behaves rather quickly.  And if she repeats the behavior once her toys are returned then just give her another dose of the same medicine.

Happy babysitting!

Miss Knowitall 

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21 Comments

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  1. Anonymous / Jun 23 2007 10:35 am

    I have a 12 year old duater that likes dipers what should I do?

  2. missknowitall / Jun 23 2007 4:02 pm

    You should read my answer to a similar question. It is titled, “Teens Wearing Diapers”, or you can see it by clicking on this link:
    http://littlemissknowitall.wordpress.com/2007/06/11/teens-wearing-diapers/

  3. unknown / Jul 19 2007 3:21 pm

    i am 12 years old and i love diapers. i love wearing them and i love to be treated like a baby. i want it to stop but at the same time i dont. i like being treated like a baby so much. once i even went to my friends house and his mom is a babysitter. she has a cupbodard full of diapers and i stole some. i did it again but i got caught and i was spanked by her. what do i do. right now im feeling like i want to end it but i need you to reply soon! help! whats wrong with me!

  4. missknowitall / Jul 20 2007 1:58 pm

    Dear Unknown,
    I think you probably enjoy it for one (or all) of three reasons:
    1. Acting like a baby gives you a sense of freedom from resposibilty and the worries of life. It is a type of escape for you.
    2. Wearing diapers is considered “wrong” or “bad” for a kid your age so it gives you a sense of rebellion, “breaking the law”, or fighting against the norms of life.
    3. It gives you a rush. Something about wearing diapers (whether it be the feel of it against your skin, or the fact that others use them sexually) stimulates you and gives you a rush.

    All of these are very normal feelings. People choose all sorts of vehicles to accomplish these feelings. These are some of the very same reasons why people fantasize about suicide even though they don’t want to die, make out with others of the same sex even though they are straight, or stuff their faces even though they want to be skinny. The feelings are normal, even if the action is not, but as long as you aren’t hurting anyone, including yourself, you are probably ok doing what ever you are doing.

    HOWEVER, if you wish to stop doing this you first have to decide that it is wrong for you. As long as you “want to stop, but at the same time don’t” you will find yourself repeating the action. Once you decide you are sure that this is wrong for you then you need to get busy. Get active in good programs, do service work, help other people. Soon you will start to feel that you have better things in life to do than what you are currently drawn to.

  5. unknown / Jul 20 2007 4:37 pm

    i dont think the first reason is right because i love acting like a baby because i love the feeling of someone babying me. infact i went to the store yesterday and bought some diapers and my mom hasnt found out yet. if she does find out what should i say? i want someone to baby me and i am going to a babysitters next week and i am going to bring my diapers and i will ask her to baby me. is this good for me?

  6. missknowitall / Jul 22 2007 1:07 pm

    Dear Unknown,
    “Good for you”? Mmmmmm, probably not. I tend to think of anything that hinders a person from growing and maturing as not good for them. If you are going to ask someone to “baby” you, please ask your mom and NOT the babysitter. It just isn’t appropriate, and could be dangerous (for you or your sitter) to involve a babysitter in a fetish behavior.

  7. taylor / Aug 1 2007 4:28 pm

    hi im a 12 year old kid addicted to diapers.i love to wear them. i know somebody who is a babysitter and i steal diapers from them. i go to a babysitter everyday for 10 hours and the babysitter treats me like a bay. i don’t get to watch tv i eat baby food wear baby clothes nap in a crib drink faormula and she diapers me. is this problem normal? my mom does not know my babysitter does this, is that bad? i love being treated like a baby but im scared that someone will found out i will be a laghing stalk. reply soon

  8. missknowitall / Aug 1 2007 4:36 pm

    I’m begining to believe that this is a normal problem. At least it is a “normal problem” at the moment for teens your age. I do think it is bad that your mother doesn’t know. Right or wrong, a mother should know everything that happens to her child while in the care of a babysitter. If you tell your mother, make sure you let her know about your concerns about it not being made public so that she will understand to keep it private.

    If you wouldn’t mind, I would like to ask you a few questions. What made you first think to wear diapers and act like a baby again? Did you ask your babysitter to help you with this, or did she suggest it?

  9. taylor / Aug 2 2007 5:22 pm

    well what made me to act like a baby again was when i saw a comercial for diapers and i just said i want to act like a baby and ive caried on with it and it has been back and forth. i did not ask my babysitter to help me with this because i knew she liked to baby kids and i was the only kidshe was babysitting from then on so i asked her to baby me. she said yes and i told her not to tell my mom because it would be to embarrising. so she treats me like a normal one year old baby.

  10. missknowitall / Aug 2 2007 5:28 pm

    Thank you for sharing that.

  11. taylor / Aug 4 2007 4:17 pm

    so what do you think i should do?

  12. missknowitall / Aug 4 2007 9:27 pm

    Taylor, I suggest that you ask yourself if this is really a road that you want to go down. Yes, it is fun, it is titillating, and is relatively harmless; but is it something that you want to remember doing when you are older? Is it something that you want to feel addicted to? Will you want to explain it to your future girlfriends or wife? If not, then you should take advantage of your youth and make a change now. Find things to do that you can feel proud of. Ask your babysitter to stop babying you or ask your mom to find you another babysitter. You should enjoy the things you do in life, not be embarrassed by them.

  13. taylor / Aug 5 2007 5:17 pm

    ok thanks for your help i will try and do that and tell you how it goes

  14. taylor / Aug 8 2007 2:29 pm

    its not going very well everything i do reminds me of diapers and my mom found out that my babysitter babies me! i want to be babied by not by my parents and i thought of diapers so much i went to the store and i got the largest size of diapers and the largest size of pull ups training pants. plz reply fast

  15. missknowitall / Aug 8 2007 4:43 pm

    Taylor, from everything you’ve just said it sounds like this is more than a fascination, or just something you do for fun. It sounds like an addiction or obsession for you. If you really want to change your behavior I suggest you and your parents read books on addictive behavior. You also need to firmly decide that this is wrong for you. As long as it is somewhat o.k. in your mind you will always be willing to give in. Another thing you should do is get very busy doing something else so that you don’t have time to engage in this action. Group activities would be a good idea since diaper wearing is usually done privately. And remember, you are not a bad person. It may take sometime for you to convince yourself that you don’t need to behave this way to find pleasure in life. Don’t give up and don’t be hard on yourself. Take a moment to write down the kind of life you want, what would you want people to know about you in ten years? Then make a plan of the things you need to do to become that person. Then, do the things on that plan.

  16. taylor / Aug 8 2007 4:46 pm

    its just that it keeps coming to me and i will not goaway almost anything will make methink of diapers babies or being babied

  17. missknowitall / Aug 9 2007 6:48 am

    That will be normal for awhile. Just keep telling yourself that there is more to life than that.

  18. Mako / Aug 20 2007 6:40 pm

    Sorry miss knowitall, but your way off on this. Taylor is going to what we know as the binge and purge cycle. Most infantilists go through it particularly through there teen years. Now your right about being this a sort of fascination or obsession. Fetish’s usually are, though if it’s non-sexual the term may not be correct, but it makes little difference other then semantics.
    Anyways, most infantilist go through a binge and purge cycles especially when knew to it, i know i did.
    Now first you have to ask yourself why you want to stop.Is it because you feel ashamed/disgusted with yourself? If so then the only thing that’s going to help is time, and support. There are a few good teen oriented infantilst oriented sites, though due to that i have not sought persmission i wish not to name them.

    Now, time for the most likely issue directed at miss knowitall.
    The more likely situation happening here is taylor is not 12 nor in this situation. There are some in the infantilism community to suffer from a twinge of exibitionism. Taylor is likely one of these people. He seeks a sort of public humiliation but in a safe annonymous enviroment like the internet. It is quite likely he hoped for you, or someone else to berate him.
    But if this is not true i deeply apologize taylor.

  19. Mako / Aug 20 2007 6:43 pm

    P.s. sorry for the double post, the binge and purge cycle is when an infantilist goes through alternating times of acceptance of themselves, and complete disgust of their desires.
    It’s called binge and purge for the many cases of infantilist buying diapers, then throwing them all out when the feel that intense resent of themselves and their feelings.
    As stated earlier this passes with time, and support.

  20. Anonymous / Mar 9 2008 5:34 pm

    ms knowitall, i am young and want to wear diapers. I go to my grandmas house and wear them. No one knows, and im afraid about the situation. Please reply asap.

  21. missknowitall / Mar 9 2008 5:38 pm

    Anonymous,
    What do you want me to reply to? Why are you “afraid about the situation”? What are you hoping I can help you with?

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