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March 28, 2007 / missknowitall

When Allergies Come Between Cats and Love

Dear Little Miss,

My wonderful husband and I have been blissfully married for almost 2 years.  This last fall we decided to add two cute little cats to our little family (no children at this moment).  My husband is slightly allergic to cats.  We knew this before we took the cats, but he said he could get allergy shots and that it wouldn’t be a problem.  All winter he has been sniffing and moaning and acting like he is going to die any minute.  It is his allergies and I know it is because of the cats.  I’ve asked him if he has gotten an allergy shot yet and he just says, “No” and, “Don’t worry about it, I’ll be fine”.  I don’t like to complain when I’m sick and I try not to inconvenience others when I feel bad, so it is driving me crazy that he is acting this way.  I have grown attached to our cats and don’t want to get rid of them, and I don’t think I should have to seeing as how he wants them too.  What should I do?

Signed ~ Caring For Two Cats and a Baby

Dear Two Cats and a Baby,

Our sweet men, we love ’em so.  Let us take a moment to feel bad for your poor man.  Your husband is literally stuck between a sniffle and sharp place.  His allergies are making him miserable and we all know that sniffles can turn any hulk of a man into a helpless little baby.  The only way to get rid of the male-debilitating sniffles here is to get a shot from a doctor and we also know that men hate, with a capital H-A-T-E, going to the doctor.  So I don’t think your hubby is trying to be annoying, or trying to get rid of the cats either, he is just feeling miserable and doesn’t like his other option.  Here are the only options I can give you that won’t hurt your marriage, and trust me when I say it is much, much, much too early in your marriage to be letting two little cats ruin your happy bliss.

1.  Just ignore it.  Let him deal with his own problems.  Once a week acknowledge his suffering and tell him you are so grateful to him for for being willing to suffer like that for you and the cats.  Tell him that he must really love those cats to be willing to go through this for them (that way he knows that this is not your problem or your fault). 

2  Get rid of the cats.  No, no, no, please don’t hate me for saying this.  I’m just stating that this is an option and while I recognize that animals can be important members of families I have to say that I think your marriage is more important.  Besides, if he knows you would be willing to do that for him, it may make him more likely to get the shot for you.

3.  Schedule an appointment for him with the doctor for this allergy shot.  Drive him there.  Hold his hand through it.  Then kiss him all over for doing such a tough thing for you.  Also, don’t let on that you are making him do this for your sanity, or for the cats, just tell him that it hurts you to see him so miserable and that you are just making him take care of himself.

May your marriage blissfully continue with your two little fuzzballs by your side.

Miss Knowitall 

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